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For Supporting Someone Else

The Civil Rights Office is committed to supporting all individuals involved in a report of discrimination or harassment, including students, employees, visitors, patients, complainants, and respondents. Whether you are a Responsible Employee, or a friend or colleague of someone who discloses an experience of misconduct to you or turns to you as a trusted contact, please find some guidance below to help you best support them.

Supporting someone in this situation may take a toll on your emotional well-being, so be sure to establish boundaries and clarify the extent of support you can reasonably provide.

Remember that Confidential and Private Resources are also available to you as you navigate through the challenges of supporting someone.

If someone shares with you that they have experienced misconduct:

  • Listen actively and let them share their experiences at their own pace without pressing for details or offering unsolicited advice.
  • Direct them to the Support and Reporting Options page on this site, where they can learn about their options, find out how CRO can help, and identify a number of confidential and private resources to support them.

If someone you know has experienced sexual violence, stalking, or relationship violence:

  • Direct them to the Confidential Resources page on this site, where they can find support. For students, this includes (among other resources) Arthur Ashe Student Health and Wellness Center and CARE (the Confidential Advocacy, Resources, and Education Support Center), which offers 24/7 confidential support. For faculty and staff, the Staff and Faculty Counseling Center can provide or connect them to confidential support.
  • Let them know about supportive measures, which are services aimed at restoring or preserving their access to UCLA’s educational programs or activities (i.e., academic and housing accommodations).
  • Encourage them to seek professional help, such as a counselor or therapist who specializes in trauma, while also respecting their decision if they are not ready to do so. Offer practical support, like checking in on them regularly, being a consistent and empathetic presence, and accompanying them to appointments if they wish.
  • For further resources on supporting a friend who discloses an instance of sexual misconduct, see CARE’s FAQs. There is also a section of the FAQs titled “Helping Others” that may assist you.

If someone confides in you because they have been reported for potential wrongdoing:

  • Being supportive does not mean endorsing any specific view of the situation. Listen without judgment and let them share their feelings and experiences openly, without interrupting. Balancing empathy with accountability is essential — it allows you to be there for an individual while staying grounded in respect for all parties involved.
  • You may want to suggest that they seek counseling. A therapist can support as they navigate this difficult time.
  • Employee Accommodations: Disability Management Services, UCLA Campus
  • Student Academic and Housing Accommodations: Center for Accessible Education (Student Resource)
  • UCLA Health Employee Accommodations: Disability Management, UCLA Health